I'd like to talk today about outside influences. Physical ones. Well, part of this blog is about my observations, and I have a few I'd like to share :)

The first involves people who have had traumas (broken bones and the like), and even well after it heals, those spots seem unusually sensitive to atmospheric changes (namely how it affects the weather patterns in an area). I had an accident a couple of weeks ago, and hurt my shoulder. It's getting better, but not 100% yet. I thought it was merely a sprain, but today, the weather here is lousy. Humid and raining all day. And my shoulder is hurting a LOT. I've heard of these types of 'sensitivities' with regards to broken bones, but not sprains (I'm hoping I didn't fracture the bone in my shoulder, which would explain the sensitivity). But I digress. Why are these areas more sensitive? I really have no theory on this, but am just posing these questions to provoke some thought. Does it have to do with some kind of fragile connection we have (but don't realize) with our ecosystem? In a similar vein, why do gloomy, rainy days tend to make people more tired than bright, cloudless sunshiny days? I've joked to people that I was "solar powered" (this coming from having worked overnights for a long time, so I developed a certain appreciation for the daytime, especially sunny days), but is it possible we are in a way, truly solar powered? Or at least, solar influenced?

A second observation I'd like to point out occurs when there's a blackout or power outage. Now obviously, if you're watching TV or doing something at night with the light on, you're going to notice a power outage. But I have noticed that whenever the power goes out even when I'm sound asleep, and all is quiet, that I bolt straight awake. Why is that? I do have a theory on that one. The buildings and homes we inhabit, those around us, are filled with electrical wiring throughout. Could we have developed some sort of subconscious sensitivity to this wiring? Mayhaps even an ultra subtle noise that our bodies somehow, somewhere recognize, but it's too low (or high) for us to pick up audibly. However, we are so in tune with it, that when it disappears, our bodies subconsciously react. Again, there seems to be some subtle connectivity we share with our environment that has yet to be explored.

The third observation dwells more on the internal environment. Sleeping and dreaming. We've all heard that we need 8 hours of sleep a night. But we all know people who do fine on 4-5 hours of sleep, or those that need 10 or more hours to get through the day. We seem to go through certain "healing" cycles when we sleep. Cycles that help to keep our brains, even our bodies more or less healthy or normal. One of those cycles involves dreaming. We're not 100% sure why we dream, or how it connects to who and how we are. It has been proven that people can *die* if they go for two weeks not being allowed to dream (like by waking the person up just as REM sleep starts, or through some other form of dream suppression). Don't be too quick to say "I hardly ever dream and I'm just fine!". You have to wake up (or be in some form of consciousness/semi consciousness, if not outright woken up) within 15 minutes after the end of a dream in order to actually recall any of it (or even having had it at all). So chances are you're dreaming, but you're just not waking up soon enough to remember it. Now, onto my point: Have you ever had a night where you've had multiple dreams (obviously waking up soon enough afterwards to recall having them, even if you did fall right back to sleep), and woken up tired, maybe even exhausted? Dreaming, even if you move physically very little in your sleep, can be quite exhausting (although some studies have shown some people get quite a workout when their bodies physically react to the dreams they are having). I believe our "sleep requirements" on a personal level, are actually more accurately measured based on our penchant for dreaming. People who dream more, tend to need more sleep. People who get by on less sleep, probably don't dream as much, or as intensely. I believe vivid dreamers (people who can actually in some semi-conscious way interact with their dreams, much like a movie director) require more sleep as they seem to have a certain, deeper connection with the subconscious and dreams than other people.
So if you're one of those people who seems to need 11 or 12 hours of sleep, even if just occasionally (like on weekends. It usually means you've been deprived of one or two of the other healing sleep cycles), don't fret it. You're probably a dreamer ;)

Wow. You'd think I'd bombed some small third world country yesterday with some of the personal responses I've gotten from my entry.

Some people vehemently agreed with me (actually, most people who responded conceded that people in general tend to be rather dumb). It was more the 'trying to help others' portion that got the response. There are one or two people who actually know how miserable I am in my current situation, and at least one of those people feels I shouldn't be giving advice, or even expecting my 'help' to actually help anyone, because I have been thus far unable to relieve my own problems. While most of her assessments were right on, this one was far off. I love this person, and consider her a dear friend (love in the 'friend/caring' way), but have to say I think she's wrong on this point.

My current situation doesn't negate the value of my advice. My past experience, and just plain common sense gives my advice and help some clout. People wouldn't be coming to me asking for my advice if they felt it wasn't going to be helpful. Granted, not everyone I try to help has asked for it, but that doesn't mean I should willingly allow them to stumble into their own holes. People can learn from past mistakes, or the mistakes of others, and should share that knowledge with others heading along similar paths. Now, obviously we can't force them to heed the advice, but just because it may be unsolicited doesn't make it any less valuable.

Admittedly, I'm no gold mine here, but I've got a decent head on my shoulders, a good deal of common sense and a good helping of life experience under my belt. Not to mention a willingness to help others (even if a part of my motivation is the satisfaction I get out of helping people). I'm one of those people who can teach you the theory, but haven't quite figured out how to apply it properly in our own lives. Does that make it less valuable? Heck no! Just because I can't apply it, doesn't mean the person(s) I share it with can't.

On top of that, many of the people who ask me for help/advice, or that I share it with have no clue what my personal life is like. So why should it make a difference? If I tell them "Just go and do it", is it going to sound any different if they know everything, or nothing about my own life? The advice is what it means to THEM, not how it applies to me, sharing it with them. And if I can't seem to get my own act together, why should I thusly neglect helping someone else? That would make things worse, IMO.

That all being said, I'd rather continue to help where I'm asked, or where I see a problem (I'd rather offer to help and be rejected, than sit idly by while someone falls). If I can figure out how to get out of my own hole along the way, so be it. But either way, I have things to share, things to teach, and I will continue to do so. If I help even one person, it's worth it, you know?

Why are people so stupid? (not you reading this, but people in general ;) Seriously though. Some people have this self-martyr complex. They have to blow everything out of proportion, and if you get mad at them, it's automatically a "deep down, seething hatred" in their eyes. Or worse, the people who can't seem to see the obvious joke, even if you had "THIS IS A JOKE" stamped all over it.

Folks, the weather is GORGEOUS here. It's spring. It's sprung. Or something like that. I won't be needing a jacket for awhile (maybe an umbrella, but that's it). I'm solar powered, so the days are just incredible (I spent years working overnights, so I developed a certain appreciation for daytime). I have two weeks all to myself. (Not a vacation, but the store owners are in canada, so I get some 'me' time). There's no reason for me to be in a bad mood, or bitter. And I'm not.

See, and this is the thing that's kind of bothering me. I'm starting to develop a "f**k you all!" attitude (not in general, just to people that do/say stupid things that peeve me), and it's not bringing my mood down like it used to. I guess "desensitizing" is a good term to use here (assuming I spelled it correctly ;). It's starting to become all too apparent that the world is full of friggin' idiots, and it's just better to step around them and move on. It used to be that when someone pissed me off, it would bring me down a bit because hey, I'm a nice guy. I don't like getting pissed off at people. But that seems to be changing. If 99 out of 100 people get the joke, and that last 1 person thinks it's serious. Screw 'em. It's not my problem. I don't like to be that way, but if they aren't willing to open their eyes to the obvious, it's not my fault. And why should I get upset or suffer because of that? There are a lot of people out there that need help. And I'm all for helping them. But there are also a lot of people out there that just want to be pitied. Sorry, but who's got time for that crap? Okay, maybe I've got time for it, but I don't have the patience for it anymore. I've met quite a few people who have it pretty good, but due to whatever (self pity, lack of life experience, etc) think they are the sorriest people on the planet. In a way, they are. But certainly not for the reasons they would have you believe.
On the other hand, I've seen people who are truly 'wading through the tarpits', and have a gung ho, gonna make it through, attitude. Sure they need help sometimes. We all do. But recognizing a legitimate need for help, and a too lazy/self pity attitude is extremely important.

Unfortunately, it seems in this world today, the legitimate need for help often goes unheeded, and the lazy/self pity attitude is far too often indulged in people.

I am not opposed to complaining. My theory is, complaining is how you deal with something that you can't actually do anything about. If you're moving furniture, and the couch is too heavy, you complain about the weight of the couch until someone comes along who can help you move it. IOW, it's not something you could overcome by yourself. Yes, there is a fine line between complaining and whining. Saying, "man, this couch is heavy. I don't know how I'm going to move it" is a complaint. Saying "The couch is too heavy! I'm never gonna be able to move it!" is whining.

Also, airing something in public (like on a messageboard or say... blog) that affects mainly (or only) you is whining. If it affects other people (especially a sizable group) is complaining (especially since you can't do anything about it).
Posting that you can't get a girlfriend, that's whining (no matter how true it may be or not ;). Posting that the lack of a salary cap in baseball is ruining the game, that's a complaint.

But hey, screw 'em all.

Okay, maybe not. I'm not that far gone yet ;) But still, people really need to take a good long look at themselves and say "am I complaining, do I legitimately need help? Or am I just lame?"

btw, my last post (the April 5th one), I was whining. I admit it ;Þ

In more nasty body news, that toenail on my big toe finally came off yesterday. I've had some bad toe luck since I moved to NH. First I break the little toe on my right foot moving a table, then I smash the big toe on my left foot in a door. That was six months ago though, and I thought the nail was going to fall off back then. It didn't hurt long (only a few days), but it was black and blue (under the nail) up until yesterday. The kids were chasing each other through the house, and one stepped on my foot w/o looking. Typical. It didn't really hurt though, as it was the lighter kid (the one I can toss around with one hand). But a few minutes later one of the other kids was like "eww, your toenail is coming off!" So I looked and lo and behold it was. About half an hour later I helped it along (it was only holding on by one little corner), so I then put one of those big bandaids on it just to protect it for now. I still have the nail and like to torment the kids with it (both the nail and the toe look pretty grody [hey, remember that term?]). I was actually a bit freaked though, as this is the first nail I've ever lost, and it just happened to be the biggest nail! (well, aside from my thumbnails). Do I put some antibacteria on it or something? Anybody with any experience out there? How long is a big toenail going to take to grow back?

On a lighter note, I also had a seriously odd dream. I'll post it later.

Just a quick note. For those of you who seem to think my blog has died. It hasn't.

The main goal of my blog is, and always has been, to entertain. Part of that involves my 'evolving' what I actually see/experience into a humorous story (like the squirrel event). It's been very gloomy and rainy here for awhile, so nothing much is really going on. I'm just working like normal, and still doing some art, but other than that, well, I don't know if I could make sleeping into an exciting story (although I kind of did once).

Anywho, just letting all my beloved fans out there (all 83,000- 82,996 of you) know that this is just a slow period, and not to worry. Thanks!